March Movie Mayhem!

Minus the vampire movies, and an end-of-month run of gangster movies that I’m still processing.

Full list here; feel free to ask questions in the comments.

Angeli senza paradiso (1970)

Netflix, original Italian with English subtitles
Fresh off the Amadeus high, I thought “Schubert! More nice music and costumes!” Eh. This is actually a standard 60s Italian romance film, with anachronistic hair and clothes. I’m mildly interested how real the story was; they made Schubert seem like a real dick (not a Dip.)

Hochzeit auf Immenhof (1956)

rbb, original Deutsch
This is the second film of a series about two girls who come to West Germany from Prussia to live with their grandmother on her pony farm after The War. So. Many. Ponies. Everywhere. It’s a time capsule now–there are some Words That Are No Longer Used–but also very sweet and funny.

Now I have to track down the other two.

The Dark Knight (2008)

Netflix, original English
The things I remember about seeing this in the theater: Gas was over $4.50/gal in Milwaukee County, and I couldn’t wait for the girlfriend to die because she was so annoying. I didn’t hate her in the first movie, so the problem might be the casting. OTOH, Melissa Scully is Commissioner Gordon’s wife. Make of that what you will.

Meh. It was at least 45 minutes too long, and did not make me want to see the third film. I know I’m supposed to love it, but I gave it a second try and it still doesn’t work for me.

Bite the Bullet (1975)

Cable, Deutsch
If you are sensitive to animal abuse, skip this film about men (and Murphy Brown) racing horses across deserts to win a prize. Some of them are quite cruel (apparently a scene had to be removed from the UK release because they violated British law against showing abuse of horses in films). The main character played by Gene Hackman is defined by how he treats animals; he rescues a orphan foal whose mother had been tortured and later beats the crap out of Airwolf for hitting a tied-up donkey. Clearly we are meant to root for him to win the race, and I was happy to do so.

All that aside, it was an interesting story, interesting characters, gorgeous scenery. The plot took an unnecessary sidebar too close to the end, apparently to get Candice Bergen more screen time, but the race was exciting and the ending satisfying.

First Sunday (2008)

Netflix, original English
Light, feel-good film with a supporting cast of Supporting-Cast All-Stars. Church ladies might not appreciate the filthy language, but it’s a good story: Ice Cube plays a non-custodial dad who does some bad stuff out of a good motivation–he wants to be actively present in his son’s life–and ultimately gets turned around by his rather charming victims, whom he helps somewhat unwittingly. Everyone wins except one slimeball.

Excellent choice as a sorbet course between the race epics and the critically-acclaimed vampires.

Gymkata (1985)

Cable, Deutsch
After yawning through the critically-acclaimed vampire art films, I enjoyed the easy silliness of this 2 a.m. gem (note to self: trademark that phrase). Kurt Thomas did not stick the landing in Hollywood after his gymnastics career ended, but the judge from Trashcanistan gives this film a solid 8, before the required point deductions*.

Short summary: Thomas’ character sets off to impress the ruler of a geographically crucial but painfully backwards society to win a favor for the US government (Elvis did a similar plot set in Tennessee, in a movie I could not finish watching). This favor will be granted if he can run a deadly obstacle course, in which no foreigner has managed to complete in nine hundred years. The ruler’s only daughter, who is of course legally contracted to marry an ally of her father’s after the race, helps train him and they fall in love. The race itself is gruesome–but in every fight scene, a piece of gymnastics equipment just happens to be in a useful position.

The high bar scene was spectacular.

As a sidebar, I am interested that American film crews worked in Soviet-bloc Yugoslavia during the Cold War. Mr R, who vacationed there as a child, suggests the Soviets didn’t care about “protecting” those territories from the corrupting influence of kapitalisches Ausland as much as other regions they controlled.

I want to remake this movie with Simone Biles, exactly as is, including running off at the end with the princess.

*Scribbling in my serial-killer comedy sketchbook is already starting to pay off, ja?

Short Circuit (1986)

Cable, original English
Saw it a couple of times in the 80s–my dad got some Johnny Five soundbite files for our Apple ][ GS out of a magazine–and then hadn’t thought of it in years. Really enjoyed it. Input! Need input!

At the risk of sounding old, there was a lot of swearing for a “family” movie. FYI.

The Wizard of Oz (1939)

Cable, original English
Mr Radish had never seen this movie before. At the end, he said, “Now I understand that joke from the Simpsons.” Another RadishFlix success!!

I prefer the book. Also, I have fond memories of attending the 2009 Oz-stravaganza in Chittenago, home of L. Frank Baum, so if you’re in the neighborhood this June, check it out.